Your Mother Slept With Wilt Chamberlain

A Sports Blog on why ALL Teams Suck…Again!

See I Told You T.O. Was a Little Bitch

Posted by Thomas the Terrible on January 14, 2008

I have little respect for Terrell Owens. Don’t get me wrong he’s a great wide receiver and one hell of an athlete, but it’s his character that I have issues with. That’s why I was, and still am elated to see him cry for a 12 year old girl who just got dumped for the first time, on television.

“It is a loss that really hurts,” Owens said, his tears shielded by a pair of dark glasses.

All loses should hurt but this lose is how last season ended as well, with the ball coming out of quarterback Tony Romo’s hand and ending up where it didn’t do Dallas any good. And for the record Romo wasn’t throwing it to T.O. either.

T.O.’s tears can only be blamed on himself. He claims he bought the plane tickets to Cabo for Romo and Simpson, as an apology for calling Simpson “a distraction” when she attended the Eagles’ upset of the Cowboys in December.

“This wasn’t about Tony. You can talk about him, you can talk about the vacation, but it’s unfair. That’s my teammate. That’s my quarterback,” Owens said, breaking into prison bitch sobs and tenderly drawing out the word quarterback.

“It’s unfair because I know what it’s like,” T.O. said. “He’s the quarterback of this team, and win or loss, it’s going to fall on his head.”

Don’t you mean you know what’s it like to always blame the quarterback and everyone else as well? Last year T.O. claimed he wasn’t used enough in the offense even though he led the league in dropped passes.

It’s the next comment that made me do a double take.

“I’ve always had a good relationship with quarterbacks,” he said. “I know what type of person I am on the inside. I know who I am.”

Paging Drs. Garcia and McNabb. The patient is not responding normally.

If you’ve ever see the show South Park then you’re familiar with the famous way Kyle Broflovski’s mom reacts to something shocking. That’s exactly what I did when I heard this. I said “Wh Wh Wha What!!”

Is T.O. talking about high school or college quarterbacks? Everyone knows the Philadelphia story and I’m not to sure calling Jeff Garcia gay even though he was dating a Playboy playmate at the time is a “good relationship.”

In any event I’m glad the Cowboys lost, I freaking hate them. Their only redeeming quality is having Jason Whitton on the team.

Giants running back Brandon Jacobs, who is a developing young trash talker, left town making some back-handed compliments.

“The Cowboys are a great football team,” he said. “They might have had a chance to win if Patrick Crayton didn’t drop the two key passes. There was a lot of talk. But it’s over with. We won the game. They’re chillin’ and we’re going to Green Bay next week.”

As Giants defensive end Michael Strahan walked off the field, he said, “Hope everyone at home enjoyed the game. I hope you had your popcorn ready.”

I know I did and I will next week as well.

This I proclaim on 1/14/08.

TtT

 

 

2 Responses to “See I Told You T.O. Was a Little Bitch”

  1. zigzag said

    Did you see that frozen faced, lip biting, thousand yard stare on that red neck Jones as time wound down? Absolutely beautiful.

  2. I definately agree, I’m going to look for that video on You Tube.

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