Your Mother Slept With Wilt Chamberlain

A Sports Blog on why ALL Teams Suck…Again!

Fresh Off the Press YMSWWC’S 2007 Bowl Guide

Posted by Thomas the Terrible on December 7, 2007

Fresh off the presses and in time to call your bookie, here are mine and Joel’s bowl picks.

  • POINSETTIA BOWL San Diego
    Dec. 20, 9 p.m. (ESPN) Utah (8-4) vs. Navy (8-4)
  • Joel: Navy-Always gotta pick a Service Academy out of respect
  • Me: Navy-Because they beat Notre Dame, UCLA can’t say that
  • NEW ORLEANS BOWL New Orleans
    Dec. 21, 8 p.m. (ESPN2) Florida Atlantic (7-5) vs. Memphis (7-5)
  • Joel: Memphis-Total homer pick
  • Me: Florida-Atlantic because I hate Tommy West
  • PAPAJOHNS.COM BOWL Birmingham, Ala.
  • Dec. 22, 1 p.m. (ESPN2) Cincinnati (9-3) vs. Southern Miss (7-5)
  • Joel: Cincinnati-Brett Favre ain’t walking through that door for Southern Miss
  • Me: Cincinnati -One of the Big Least teams has to win
  • NEW MEXICO BOWL Albuquerque, N.M.
    Dec. 22, 4:30 p.m. (ESPN) New Mexico (8-4) vs. Nevada (6-6)
  • Joel: New Mexico-I got nothing for New Mexico
  • Me: Honestly I could care less who ever Jol picked
  • LAS VEGAS BOWL Las Vegas
    Dec. 22, 8 p.m. (ESPN) BYU (10-2) vs. UCLA (6-6)
  • Joel: BYU-The Fightin’ Polygamists
  • Me: BYU- UCLA has no coach and Big Love is a good show
  • HAWAII BOWL Honolulu, Hawaii
    Dec. 23, 8 p.m. (ESPN) East Carolina (7-5) vs. Boise State (10-2)
  • Joel: Boise St.-Please not another cheerleader proposal
  • Me: East Carolina-Why?Who the hell knows
  • MOTOR CITY Detroit
    Dec. 26, 7:30 p.m. (ESPN) Central Michigan (8-5) vs. Purdue (7-5)
  • Joel: Central Michigan-Why is Joe Tiller still a coach???
  • Me: Purdue-Because Joe Tiller is the God of mediocre coaches.
  • HOLIDAY BOWL San Diego
    Dec. 27, 8 p.m. (ESPN) Arizona State (10-2) vs. Texas (9-3)
  • Joel: Texas-Longhorns returns to their San Diego winter home & I get to hear them bitch about it. I should pick against them
  • Me: Texas-ASU has shown me nothing and their coach is a douche.
  • CHAMPS SPORTS BOWL Orlando, Fla.
    Dec. 28, 5 p.m. (ESPN) Boston College (10-3) vs. Michigan State (7-5)
  • Joel: Boston College-The Spartans have broken my heart & bank account too many times over the years
  • Me: BC-Michigan State sucks
  • TEXAS BOWL Houston
    Dec. 28, 8 p.m. (NFL Network) TCU (7-5) vs. Houston (8-4)
  • Joel: TCU-Houston has no coach because Art Briles took the death sentence…I mean Baylor job…
  • Me: TCU-Coolest Mascot name “The Horny Toads”
  • EMERALD BOWL San Francisco
    Dec. 28, 8:30 p.m. (ESPN) Maryland (6-6) vs. Oregon State (8-4)
  • Joel: Oregon St.-Love the nickname “Beavers”, as in plural. Just keep the gay rams away
  • Me: Maryland-Fattie Ralph always wins these types of games
  • MEINEKE CAR CARE BOWL Charlotte, N.C.
    Dec. 29, 1 p.m. (ESPN) UConn (9-3) vs. Wake Forest (8-4)
  • Joel: Wake Forest-In a battle of Dunkin Donuts (UConn) vs. Krispy Kremes (WF), gotta go with the Southern favorite
  • Me: Wake Forest-because they’re playing a Big Least team
  • LIBERTY BOWL Memphis, Tenn.
    Dec. 29, 4:30 p.m. (ESPN) Mississippi State (7-5) vs. UCF (10-3)
  • Joel: Miss. St-More Cowbell
  • Me: Miss State-Let the Crooming begin!
  • ALAMO BOWL San Antonio
    Dec. 29, 8 p.m. (ESPN) Penn State (8-4) vs. Texas A&M (7-5)
  • Joel: Penn St.-Does JoePa realize he is GREATLY overpaid???
  • Me: Penn St.-Texas A&M’s newest coach is to busy being an assistant for a losing NFL team.
  • INDEPENDENCE BOWL Shreveport, La.
  • Dec. 30, 8 p.m. (ESPN) Colorado (6-6) vs. Alabama (6-6)
  • Joel: Colorado-Alabama won’t be beaten by the Fightin Nutria of Louisiana-Monroe, but they can eat some in Shreveport. Nothin’ says luvin’ like nutria in the oven
  • Me: This is bullshit!!! Joel & I had a rock, paper, scissors contest. The winner got to choose Colorado. He cheated so I’m forced to pick Alabama.
  • ARMED FORCES BOWL Fort Worth, Texas
  • Dec. 31, 12:30 p.m. (ESPN) Cal (6-6) vs. Air Force (9-3)
  • Joel: Air Force-A motivated serviceman vs. an unmotivated hippie??? Gee, I wonder who to pick
  • Me: Air Force-Because Cal seems to be the South Carolina of the PAC 10. (snicker)
  • SUN BOWL El Paso, Texas
    Dec. 31, 2 p.m.(ESPN) USF (9-3) vs. Oregon (8-4)
  • Joel: South Florida-Which team is worse right now???
  • Me: Oregon-Ryan Leaf’s younger brother is playing well, making Ryan look less douche like.
  • HUMANITARIAN BOWL Boise, Idaho
    Dec. 31, 2 p.m. (ESPN2) Fresno State (8-4) vs. Georgia Tech (7-5)
  • Joel: Fresno St.-Love the Bulldogs coach Craig Stadler, I mean Paul Teutel, I mean Pat Hill. Has one man reminded you of so many???
  • Me: Fresno St-The only conference that is as bad as the Big Least is the ACC. And GT is coach-less.
  • MUSIC CITY BOWL Nashville, Tenn.
    Dec. 31, 4 p.m. (ESPN) Florida State (7-5) vs. Kentucky (7-5)
  • Joel: Kentucky-The cops will not hesitate to arrest a football player in Nashville. Ask the Titans. I love Fat Moe’s in Nashville for burgers
  • Me: KY-Bobby Bowden is almost ready to retire with good reason. Lately FSU sucks big time.
  • INSIGHT BOWL Tempe, Ariz.
    Dec. 31, 5:30 p.m. (NFL Network) Indiana (7-5) vs. Oklahoma State (6-6)
  • Joel: Indiana-Indy is a team of destiny. OSU has “America’s Coach”. I go with the Hoosiers. OSU did choke against Texas…AGAIN…
  • Me: Indiana-Because Mike “I’m a man. I’m 40!!!!!!!” Gundy is lose on purpose. To honor Coach Heff.
  • CHICK-FIL-A BOWL Atlanta
    Dec. 31, 7:30 p.m. (ESPN) Clemson (9-3) vs. Auburn (8-4)
  • Joel: Clemson-This is the “Who will coach Arkansas” Bowl
  • Me: Auburn-Since both coaches rejected Arkansas, Tommy T must prove he was right to stay.
  • OUTBACK BOWL Tampa, Fla.
    Jan. 1, 11 a.m. (ESPN) Wisconsin (9-3) vs. Tennessee (9-4)
  • Joel: God’s Orange Team-Wake me up when this one is over. Wisconsin is boring to watch but Madison is great to visit
  • Me: Tennessee-GO VOLS BITCHES! I hate cheddar cheese.
  • COTTON BOWL Dallas
    Jan. 1, 11:30 a.m. (FOX) Missouri (11-2) vs. Arkansas (8-4)
  • Joel: Arkansas-Big 12 has seen nothing like McFadden and Jones, but they have seen crappy QB’s like Casey Dick. Advantage Hogs
  • Me: Missouri-Arkansas still might be coach-less. Miss. got the shaft.
  • GATOR BOWL Jacksonville, Fla.
  • Jan. 1, Noon (CBS) Virginia (9-3) vs. Texas Tech (8-4)
  • Joel: Texas Tech-I love the pass 1st, 2nd, 3rd, 4th, and 5th options of Tech. Won’t win titles but is exciting to watch
  • Me: TT-Virginia it’s back to the reality that you suck.
  • CAPITAL ONE Orlando, Fla.
    Jan. 1, 1 p.m. (ABC) Michigan (8-4) vs. Florida (9-3)
  • Joel: Florida-Michigan’s defense was horrible right??? Tebow will account for 10 TD’s
  • Me: Florida-Teabag Tebow could beat Appy State blindfolded.
  • ROSE BOWL Pasadena, Calif.
    Jan. 1, 4:30 p.m. (ABC) USC (10-2) vs. Illinois (9-3)
  • Joel: USC-Fightin Zookers are still young. Plus we get to see the USC Song Girls
  • Me: USC-I like the Fighting Zookers but USC is just to damn strong.
  • SUGAR New Orleans
    Jan. 1, 8:30 p.m. (FOX) Hawaii (12-0) vs. Georgia (10-2)
  • Joel: Georgia-The Bulldogs are hot right now. This will be closer than people think, I think
  • Me: Georgia-I think Joel is high. Georgia will beat this team so bad, they’ll forced to put up a UGA statue in Honolulu.
  • FIESTA BOWL Glendale, Ariz.
  • Jan. 2, 8:00 p.m. (FOX) West Virginia (10-2) vs. Oklahoma (11-2)
  • Joel: Oklahoma-Great passing team (OU) vs. Berlin Wall defense (WVU). I pick Sooners
  • Me: Boomer Sooners Baby! This lose will be so bad that White and Slaton will go to the NFL early.
  • ORANGE BOWL Miami
    Jan. 3, 8 p.m. (FOX) Kansas (11-1) vs. Virginia Tech (11-2)
  • Joel: Va. Tech-Mangino will be the next spokesman for Nutra System
  • Me: Kansas-Beemer sucks in bowl game, especially ones he should win.
  • INTERNATIONAL BOWL Toronto
  • Jan. 5, Noon (ESPN2) Rutgers (7-5) vs. Ball State (7-5)
  • Joel: Rutgers-Canada has a bowl now??? What, was no hockey game available that day???
  • Me: First I want to personally thank the NFL Network making this game available to only 1/3 of the population. It saves a lot of people of suffering though another Big Least disappointment. Oh yeah Ball State…Free Text books and David Letterman.
  • GMAC BOWL Mobile, Ala.
  • Jan. 6, 8 p.m. (ESPN) Tulsa (9-4) vs. Bowling Green (8-4)
  • Joel: Tulsa-I got nothing for this one
  • Me: Tulsa-They have a big time running back who will do well in the pros.
  • BCS TITLE GAME New Orleans
    Jan. 7, 8 p.m. (FOX) Ohio State (11-1) vs. LSU (11-2)
  • Joel: LSU-Ask OU in 2003 how crazy it will be in the Superdome. i’ve been to both Ohio Stadium and Tiger Stadium and while both are loud, LSU fan is a different breed of fan altogether. They’re fun and potentially violent at the same time. Buckeye fan has not seen anything like it. If you think it will be hostile, it will be worse. Not even Les Miles and his Pope hat can screw this one up. Or can he???
  • Me: LSU-Ohio State thought last year was bad, wait till they play this team. Enough said!

So I profess on this day 12/07/07

TtT

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