Your Mother Slept With Wilt Chamberlain

A Sports Blog on why ALL Teams Suck…Again!

The Super Bowl Aftermath knows no boundaries

Posted by Thomas the Terrible on February 3, 2009

Are you like Sad Vader who is pictured above? Are you depressed because the Arizona Cardinals blew it by not playing defense in the final minutes of the game? Things could be worse though.

Worse? “How could things be worse” you ask yourselves. Well, take Matt Cassel for instance. He went to the ESPN Super Bowl party and got urinated on. Talk about fun times!

“The football star was in line for the bathroom at ESPN’s Tampa Bay Super Bowl bash Friday night when a drunken reveler tried to cut in front of him. “Matt told him to wait his turn and headed into the urinals,” a spy tells us. Moments later, the fella barged in and proceeded to purposefully pee directly on Cassel‘s leg. After security tossed the drunk, Cassel headed back out into the crowd, wet pants and all.”

That is the downside of inviting R. Kelly to perform at your party. We all knew Matt was going to be showered with golden offers this off-season, but this seems a bit premature. also had some issues with the Cardinals losing in the last minutes as well. The Cardinals championship DVD leaves out the last 1:30.

Tiki Barber was unimpressed with both teams.

“If they played this game in the regular season, it would be a [regional] game, and no one would watch.”

If Tiki Barber did the play-calling for this game in the regular-season, even more people would dislike Tiki.

Some Arizona fans got a little action during the Super Bowl. For Cardinal fans that say watching Fitzgerald play is better than having sex they had to opportunity to compare that. After Fitzgerald’s amazing fourth quarter catch some Tucson viewers were treated with about 30 seconds of pornography that involved full frontal nudity.

“KVOA will continue to investigate what happened to our clean signal and make sure our viewers get answers,” Nielsen said in the statement. Comcast spokeswoman Tracy Baumgartner confirmed that the company’s standard feed was interrupted during the Super Bowl, although she said its high definition feed was not.

Baumgartner said engineers at Philadelphia-based Comcast were investigating Sunday night. Tucson media outlets reported that they received calls from irate viewers about the pornographic material. Joel Hilander of Tucson told The Associated Press that he and his young children saw the clip. “I couldn’t believe it. And I couldn’t believe that my children were watching it either,” Hilander said.”

For more on this story, let’s go to the Arizona Daily Star message board:

Yes, they did. I had two teenagers and a 10 year old watching the game with me and they all saw every graphic segment of it. What on earth is Comcast doing? I can’t believe I pay them. – Celeste L. (Watchdog), February 1,2009 @ 8:35PM

This was disgusting and heads should roll. I would love to have someone come and explain this to my first grade students tomorrow! I am canceling my Comcast subscription tomorrow and I hope that all the other Comcast members do also. – jammie s. (densan), February 1,2009 @ 8:36PM

Michael Jackson would be more than happy to conduct a demonstration if she likes.

Dang! I had a full living room of kids from 3-17 and their friends!!! What a horrible thing to happen! I’m going to have to disconnect…I can’t trust that it won’t happen during Barney or Sesame Street! – Tess L. (TucsonTess), February 1,2009 @ 8:58PM

This next post is classic comedy genius…

Yeah, well they interrupted my porn movie with 30 seconds of super bowl action. Nothing quite so disgusting as full-frontal football. Yeech. – Rowan D. (RowD1), February 1,2009 @ 8:58PM

So a big dong goes and ruins Cardinals fans viewing experience. In showbiz, that’s called foreshadowing.

This website has the extremely disturbing video. (Thanks for the link Chad…you perv)

So you see Arizona fans not all is lost and yes love hurts…


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