Your Mother Slept With Wilt Chamberlain

A Sports Blog on why ALL Teams Suck…Again!

Sounds like Dwyane Wade’s former business partner is a little green with envy to me

Posted by Thomas the Terrible on February 11, 2009

Smoking weed is awesome, baby!! With a capital A

As if it isn’t bad enough that Dwyane Wade’s wife claimed he has some kinda of super secret STD during their volatile divorce proceedings, a former business partner claims he saw Wade pull a Michael Phelps and also saw “remnants” of wild sex parties that occurs at an apartment that was used by Wade and his posse.

“The man isn’t what people worldwide think he is,” Von Houtman said Sunday in an extensive interview. “He and his friends are just a bunch of idiots. I mean, I’m in Chicago at a charity party in 2007, and weed is being passed around and Wade takes a hit. In front of everybody.

“I got sucked into doing business with him because he has a first-class media persona, the new Michael Jordan. He was that good guy, father-of-the-year, celebrity who had his head on his shoulder. I found out after a year he was not like that.”

This Von Houtman person claims met Wade in 2006 and went into business together to develop a franchises of restaurants named D. Wade’s Place. He claims he leased Wade a $1.7 million, two-story condo in what is known as the Spear Building which is on Miami Beach.  He states that Wade and his childhood friend Marcus Andrews was to use it as the  headquarters for their marketing company, Wade Global Enterprises. But, according to Van Houtman, it also became a headquarters for D. Wade’s Sin City…

Cue the Barry White music.

“They’d have these parties in there two or three times a week,” Von Houtman said. “There were always dozens of people in there. Rappers, Dwyane and his entourage, women they’d pick up in clubs. They (Wade and Andrews) both made it clear to me how their goal in life is to have sex with as many women as possible.”

Van Houtman then resumed checking in at his other properties, including the Poke, Pump, Stab and Heterosexual Vaginal Intercourse buildings.

Wade’s publicist says Van Houtman is apparently either watching to much porn and fantasying about Wade at the same time or is flat out lying.

In my opinion, if Wade and his friend claimed to have said that their goal in life was to have sex with every woman possible, then they’re just regular dudes. And with a tear in my eye I shout “USA! USA! USA!”

If a NBA star in his prime can’t smoke pot and have sex with unattainable women without some jackass tattling as soon as his divorce hearing comes up, then those “man law” commercials have meant nothing!


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