Your Mother Slept With Wilt Chamberlain

A Sports Blog on why ALL Teams Suck…Again!

The “Real” Winner of The Masters was…

Posted by Thomas the Terrible on April 14, 2009

Sure Angel Cabrera technically won The Masters and get to wear one of the ugliest green jackets known to man however the real winner was John Daly. 

So what if the fascist good time hating overlords that make up the PGA suspended Daly for six months because of a little “misunderstanding” due to the many Jager bombs with beer chasers that Daly so much enjoys. That doesn’t stop him from turning a profit though did it? 

What you can't see are the 8 empty beer cans and crushed marlboro packs near his bucket of golf balls...

Daly was selling his clothing line just outside the gates of Augusta National. I mean look at the photo above. It was taken during the 2006 Masters and what red blooded man wouldn’t want to look like that? 

From the John Daly Apparel site

Comfort is the key ingredient in John Daly Apparel. Most items carrying the “Daly Comfort Wear” tag are made from Technical Performance fabrics that are moisture wicking, deodorizing and provide SPF protection. There are also some very high-end cotton and extraordinary specialty lifestyle shirts. 

Free 12-pack of Milwaukee’s Best with purchase and sizes range from XXL to Charlie Weis. Do they have replicas of all his orange jumpsuits with actual inmate numbers? That would be pretty solid.

Hey the man did have John Gruden as his caddie once…how many of us can say that? Of course how many people can claim (or at least want to claim) that they were found passed out drunk in a Hooters parking lot? Wait that was me in middle school, bad example. 

The real question is which bus has more wing bones lying around: Daly’s or the Madden Cruiser?

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