A Blue Hen gets stabbed…by themselves….maybe…
Posted by Thomas the Terrible on July 13, 2009
The University of Delaware’s top wide receiver was arrested for a stabbing, except he might have been the one that was stabbed. Unless he wasn’t the stabber. It’s confusing. Let’s chase this vortex of confusion a little further.
The Blue Hen’s best offensive player, Mark Duncan, might not be ready for the upcoming season due to getting stabbed and being charged with filing a false police report. Duncan was admitted to the hospital because of a stab wound on 05/30/09, and told the police he was attacked and victimized by some stranger while playing basketball. I’m sure things like this happen all the time in the state of Delaware so of course that version of the story is believable.
Then something happened to his story and it changed. Duncan then said he knew his attacker however he refused to give him or her up to the local Po Po. I believe something was whispering in his mind’s eye: Stab wound? That’s nothing. Only bitches get stitches.
A few days later the story changed again. In this version Duncan states he was out walking and four men jumped him.
Newark (Del.) police issued a warrant this week “after determining that he’d switched his story too many times,” which goes to show that three times is the charm to go from hapless victim to lying football player with a hole in him.
What still hasn’t been answered is: Who really stabbed Duncan? Did he stab himself as a way to get out of the state of Delaware a year early? Oh and he threw a ball at the cop in the National Championship game.