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Archive for the ‘Couch Burning’ Category

Howdy Doody Has A Doozy Deal

Posted by Joel Jackson on September 24, 2008

For the 2 regular readers of this blog (and the thousands of trolls), you may or may not know that West By God Virginia holds a special place in our hearts and minds. By no stretch are we Mountaineer fans. Our beloved orange warriors win championships (although none in football thanks to that fat, stubborn…sorry, wrong subject). All one has to do is type West Virginia in the search box to see plenty of Mountaineer fodder.

So whenever this fine institute of higher learning makes the news, we take special notice. I mean, why wouldn’t we??? The writers at The Young & The Restless couldn’t write more drama in the past year. Just Rich Rodriguez alone would be Victor Newman, and Michigan would be the new young and beautiful chick that stolls into Genoa City that he would bang instantly.

In Coach Bill Stewart’s contract, the signed deal includes 1 extra year that wasn’t on the original offer sheet. Also, if he is fired before January 3, 2009, the school must pay him $4.125 million. Former embattled school president Mike Garrison can’t be blamed for this one though, because he was gone by the time the contract was finalized and signed, which was on Sept. 10. The big deal was that a flat $1 million buyout clause was negotiated and agreed upon in the original offer sheet. In other words, now West Virginia can’t fire this guy until Jan. 4. By then, the Mountaineers could easily be 6-6. There is hope though, 6-6 could be good enough to win the Big East.

West Virginia is it’s own worst enemy. Shame too. The school could be great. Wait, let me re-phrase that. The school could be better than mediocre. Whenever the administration and athletics department decide to join 2008 and get out of 1972, please let me know. For all I know, they could still be playing John Denver in Mountaineer Field on an 8 track. Mountain momma, take me home…

Posted in BCS, Big East, bongs, boo birds, boosters, College Football, Couch Burning, Crack, NCAA, West Virginia, West Virginia Mountaineers, whiners, white trash, WVU | Tagged: , , , , , , , , , , , , , | Leave a Comment »

Resume Watch: After Hurricane Ike Edition

Posted by Joel Jackson on September 22, 2008

On a serious note, those less fortunate along the Texas coast can use whatever help you can give. You can donate money to the Red Cross by clicking here. Large amounts of products, such as diapers, toothbrushes, water, etc. can be made by clicking here.

Anyway, it is time for the following coach to update his resume. No, not a certain coach in Knoxville. I am sure plenty of fellow Vols are busy writing his resume for him. I am talking about mi amigo, and possibly the absolute worst hire at a major D-1A program this side of Coach O…

MY good buddy, Bill Stewart. The man who is supposed the lead the Mountaineers to the promise land. The guy who was supposed to lead the Mountaineer program to a national title. The genius that would turn Pat White into the pocket passer that Rodriguez couldn’t develop. The master of all things West By God Virginia.

Hey Thomas, remember all of those many comments from the Mountaineer faithful that came to the site the days leading to the Fiesta Bowl, and when Team Turmoil beat Oklahoma??? Where the hell are they now??? I said back then that the school decided to go with the one night stand instead of the sure thing. And now they sit 1-2. Looking at the remainder of the schedule, I see losses to Auburn and South Florida. I can see a possible upset to Louisville and UConn (man I can’t believe I said that). Howdy Doody.

So, Coach Bill Stewart, you are a nice guy. You are in over your head, but a nice guy. Unfortunately, all of those lonely couches in Morgantown are missing the warm embrace of kerosene and matches. They cannot burn themselves, and with you at the helm, I am afraid that instead of the fall smell that normally encompasses the air in West Virginia won’t be the sweet mix of cotton/polyester blends and pressboard. Instead, it will be the usual scent of coal, sulphur, meth, and depression. And there is no one else to blame but the meddling governor, the outgoing school president, and the inept AD. Country roads…

Posted in Big East, Bill Stewart, boo birds, boosters, coach o, Coach Rich Rodriguez, College Football, Couch Burning, NCAA, Sports, West Virginia, West Virginia Mountaineers, whiners, WVU | 1 Comment »

The Bill Stewart era has begun!

Posted by Thomas the Terrible on September 8, 2008

Bill Stewart the destroyer of dreams.

Posted in Big East, Bill Stewart, Couch Burning, East Carolina Pirates, EKU, Shattered, Skip Holtz, upsets, West Virginia Mountaineers, WVU | Tagged: , , , , , , , , , | Leave a Comment »