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College Football Week 5 is in the books & here’s what I learned

Posted by Thomas the Terrible on September 28, 2008

Ah how I love upsets and there were plenty for this week.

Well the Fulmer death clock continues to tick…as always be expecting a full game grade tomorrow after I watch a tape of the game today.

Don’t look now but UCONN is 5-0, you should expect them to be ranked.

Michigan State is a contender for now…but for some reason they always implode mid season.

Speaking of imploding, Syracuse actually led Pittsburgh but ultimately lost. There’s internet chatter about Lloyd Carr becoming the next Orangemen coach.

Clemson…WTF? Oh, wait my mistake…the annual Tommy Bowden fail is occurring.

Northwestern is 5-0 and Iowa still sucks.

The miracle that occurred in the Miami-North Carolina game was amazing to watch.

Gee. Urban…is fourth down and one yard to go. You trail by one with time quickly ticking away. Why didn’t you try the 49 yard field goal? Was it arrogance? At least update the play book and run something other than a Tebow keeper. Great win for Ole Miss and the Rev. Nutt.

Fresno state continues to win and I love it.

I’m getting sick and damn tired of seeing that stupid Olive Garden commercial that they were over playing last year.

I hate F$U when I pick them to win, they let down. Win I pick to lose they win. Bastards!

Look out Notre Dame is 3-1 let’s place them in the Top 5 stat!

Rich “Dirty Sanchez” Rodriguez gets a huge…huge win against a top 10 Wisconsin team.

I hope you enjoyed your visit to the top 25 East Carolina because it is officially over.

Wow…Navy beats Wake Forest…just how bad does the ACC suck?

Oklahoma should have scored more points than they did.

South Carolina struggled against a UAB team that Tennessee blew out…interesting.

Wow Miss. State does have an offense after all, to bad they lost though.

Look for South Florida to enter the top 10 this week.

Welcome back Virginia Tech. however the first year Nebraska coach actually helped your cause by getting a 15 yard penalty for “debating” a call with the ref.

I hope Ty Willingham has called North American Moving by now.

What can I say about Alabama…other than they cheat, but they laid it on Georgia. Anyone else notice that Nick Saban is sporting the Behr Bryant alcoholism red nose?

Don’t look now but Duke is 3-1 and the Virginia coach is probably and should be suicidal at this point.

Joe Pa rules bitches but give the fighting Zookers credit for keeping it respectable.

Posted in Alabama Crimson Tide, alcoholics, Bama Cheats, Big East, big ten football, Big Twelve Football, Clemson Tigers, Crimson Tide, David Cutcliffe, Duke Blue Devils, East Carolina Pirates, fire philip fulmer, Florida Gators, Florida State Seminoles, Georgia Bulldogs, Herban Meyer, Houston Nutt, Illinois Fighting Illini, Internet Rumors, Joe Pa, Joe Paterno, jorts, Lloyd Carr, LSU Tigers, Miami hurricanes, Michigan State Spartons, Michigan Wolverines, Nebraska Cornhuskers, Nick Saban, North Carolina Tarheels, Notre Dame Fighting Irish, notre dame sucks, Oklahoma sooners, Pac 10 football, Penn State Nittany Lions, Roll Tide, SEC Coaches, SEC Football, Skip Holtz, South Florida Bulls, suicide, Tennessee Volunteers, UCLA, Uga, upsets, Urban Meyer, Virginia Tech, Wisconsin Badgers, WTF, Zooker | Tagged: , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , | 3 Comments »

Rich Rodriguez…Quitter…

Posted by Joel Jackson on July 10, 2008


What the hell happened??? A settlement??? Are you kidding me??? What were you thinking??? You were supposed to stick it to the man, and instead you said that you give up.

I know, I know, Michigan forced it. Sure, they are footing the bill (which you created). I know, your new job bailed your maize and blue bottom out of the sizzling flames. It must be nice for Michigan to pull $3 million out of it’s war chest to cover you. Ironic, the new athletic facilities you were bitching and moaning about because they were non-existent, are now about to go full steam ahead thanks to you bolting for Michigan.

So now what??? How could you honestly look a kid in the eye and expect them to keep running gassers when they have nothing left??? You gave up. Some may say good for you leaving West Virginia. That is a question for another time. The issue at hand is that you quit WVU, created nuclear winter on your way out, got your new employer to pay your old employer, and in a few years you will probably leave again for the B.C. Lions of the Canadian Football League.

Honestly, you are no better than Nick Saban, your favorite fellow West Virginian. And like St. Nick, you will be lucky to go to a bowl game this year. Hooray, Michigan fans, the Scratch n’ Sniff.Com Bowl in Butte, Montana await you. And all for the low, low price of $36 million over the next 4 years. On top of it all, you managed to make West Virginia University something that Kinko’s bought MBA degrees couldn’t do. You made them look smart.

Of course, if you had Paul Rhoades, former defensive coordinator of Pitt, as your lawyer, you could have easily stopped the Mountaineers (13-9)…

Posted in Ass Whipping, BCS, big 10, Big East, big ten, big ten football, Bill Stewart, boo birds, boosters, Coach Rich Rodriguez, College Football, dumbass, football, Football Poll, Lloyd Carr, Michigan, Michigan Wolverines, NCAA, Sports, West Virginia, West Virginia Mountaineers, WVU | Leave a Comment »

All Hail Emperor Rodriguez!

Posted by Thomas the Terrible on December 21, 2007

Come on hail. Now damn it hail!! Freaking slackers.

Now that Rich “Dirty Sanchez” Rodriguez has been exiled to Michigan, he has decisively taken over. His order of business was to fire all the Michigan assistant coaches, leaving Coach Carr to coach his last game seemingly by himself. Michigan athletic director Bill Martin declined comment. It is believed he declined to comment out of fear.

Of course the assistants must have known this was coming, or should I say one assistant knew. Apparently University of Michigan assistant football coach Andy Moeller, out of fear, went out to relieve some of the stress that was upon him last Saturday night. The problem is the Po Po pulled him over. Moeller in brazen fashion refused to take a breathalyzer test and was arrested.

“At this point the outcome is still pending and we will monitor the process,” athletic director Bill Martin said in a written statement. Michigan head coach Lloyd Carr did not immediately return a message.”

So now Moeller is officially an unemployed drunk. This is the power of Emperor Rodriguez.

Back in West Virginia, the governor has jumped on the bash Rodriguez bandwagon. Please note I’m the original Rodriguez basher it’s nice to see I’m making a difference. Gov. Joe Manchin is siding with the university and its claims that Rodriguez owes 4 million dollars.

“All I’ve seen is mammoth improvements, tremendous improvements; I don’t know the intricacies of it. I’m speaking as a fan,” Manchin said.

“Manchin said Thursday he doesn’t care who pays.”Whoever, I just want West Virginia to get the $4 million,” the governor said. “If someone is generous enough to pay it, that’s fine.”

That’s smart politicking if you ask me.

So I profess on this day 12/21/07.


Posted in Big East, big ten football, Coach Rich Rodriguez, Lloyd Carr, Michigan Wolverines, West Virginia Mountaineers, WVU | Tagged: , , , , , , | 1 Comment »

BCS Bowls Announced Let the Bitching & Complaining Begin!

Posted by Thomas the Terrible on December 2, 2007

It’s that time again. BCS announcement day. A day where every college football fan can interject their thoughts about who got in, who didn’t & who should be in championship game. Let’s see who gets in and who doesn’t. I’m not picking any winners. Joel & I will do that later this week, with all the bowls.

The Sugar Bowl

Georgia Bulldogs Vs. Hawaii.

OK, Dawg fans I know you’re upset that you didn’t get in. One argument is Georgia beat Kentucky who in turn beat LSU, so Georgia should be in. On the flip-side is LSU beat South Carolina & Tennessee who both beat Georgia. The deciding factor that everyone is forgetting about is the blow out win LSU had over Virginia Tech, who by the way is a BCS bowl team. If I had my way, Georgia would face LSU for the title.

Orange Bowl

Virginia Tech vs Kansas.

OK Missouri fans I’ll admit you got robbed of a BCS birth. The only lose Kansas suffered this year is at the hands of Missouri. If I had my way it would be Oklahoma playing Kansas.

Fiesta Bowl

Oklahoma vs West Virginia.

Oklahoma will be looking to redeem themselves this year while West Virginia will looking to give White & Slaton some sort of an excuse to stay one more year. Honestly I don’t believe the Big East should even get an automatic bowl bid. They only have eight football teams. My choice would be putting Arizona State in there instead.

Rose Bowl

Illinois vs USC

Honestly I believe Michigan should have gotten the nod and I like the fighting Zookers. This might be the best game. USC is playing awfully well and so is Illinois. Again I would put Michigan in there, but I’ll admit I would have rather seen Zook face Florida also.

National Championship

Ohio State vs LSU

The Big Eleven Ten really needs to add another team so they can have a championship game. This LSU gets to be the ninth SEC team to smack OSU in the face with 9 inches of limp. Oh wait, sorry I’m kinda picking aren’t I? OSU back doored themselves into this game. One thing that makes this game interesting is the fact Les “Big Hat Small Penis” Miles turned Michigan down. So when if LSU beats OSU, Michigan fans will really learn to hate Les Miles, because Michigan can’t seem to do that recently.

So I profess on this day 12/03/07


Posted in ACC Football, BCS, big ten football, Big Twelve Football, Florida Sucks, Georgia Bulldogs, Hawaii Warriors, Illinois Fighting Illini, Jim Tressel, kansas jayhawks, Les Miles, Lloyd Carr, LSU Tigers, Mark Mangino, Michigan Wolverines, Missouri Tigers, moral victories, ohio state buckeyes, Oklahoma sooners, SEC Football, The Big East, University of Southern Cal, Virginia Tech, West Virginia Mountaineers, whiners, Zooker | 1 Comment »

Hold the Phone Folks, Les Miles Might Not Leave LSU After All.

Posted by Thomas the Terrible on December 1, 2007

And the drama continues… This morning complete corporate tool Kirk Herbstreit one of the members of ESPN’s boy band, College Game Day, reported that Michigan was going to name Les Miles head coach early next week. Funny how the “story” broke right LSU face Tennessee in SEC championship game.

Of course all the media was a buzz a good part of the day. Some were outraged at the timing of the announcement and some members of the liberal media were questioning how a deal could have come about so quickly.

We now ESPN is reporting that Les Miles isn’t leaving LSU and he has a new contract to sign with LSU. Story

” LSU coach Les Miles will remain the school’s football coach rather than consider a move to Michigan, athletic director Skip Bertman said Saturday.

“Coach Miles and the chancellor have already worked out a contract that they’re happy with, but it hasn’t been signed yet,” Bertman said.”

Whether this report is true is the question. What does Michigan have to say about this? If Miles doesn’t become the next coach for Michigan who will they go after? What become of the Old Ball Sack Coach God Spurrier? He was counting on that LSU job you know.

Stay tuned to find out more. Hopefully Joel can help me get a handle on this, since I’ll be away from the computer after 3:00 EST. today.


Les has spoken! Story

“I am the head coach at LSU. I will be the head coach at LSU,” Miles said Saturday. “I have no interest in talking to anybody else.”

“I’ve got a championship game to play, and I’m excited about the opportunity of my damn strong football team to play,” he said. “It’s unfortunate that I had to address my team with that information this morning.

“I represent me in this issue, please ask me after. I’m busy,” he said.

Bahahahah. I love it. Now let’s see if Miles pulls a Saban in upcoming days.

So I profess on this day 12/01/07



Posted in ESPN, Kirk Herbstreit, Les Miles, Lloyd Carr, LSU Tigers, Michigan Wolverines | Tagged: , , , , , | 3 Comments »

The Revelations After a Saturdays Worth of Football Week 11

Posted by Thomas the Terrible on November 11, 2007

#1 tOSU falls, more chaos for the BCS. This is the best college football season ever!

I’ve already said my piece about Ohio State, but Ron Zook might the Big Eveleen Ten coach of the year.

If Kansas wins out they will play for the national championship. The game against Missouri looms larger than the Kansas coach.

Boston College proves why they were over ranked.

Mark Richt is pumping up the crowd on the sidelines, getting the black jerseys for his players…he’s finally coming out of his shell. No team wants to play Georgia right now. Ask Auburn.

Virginia Tech might be better than what some of us thought.

Welcome back to realty Michigan, however you still have a chance of beating tOSU next week.

Ha Ha Ha Uconn got beat, another Big Least team has their BCS dreams crushed.

South Carolina went from ranked 6 in the country to a joke during their four game losing streak.

It doesn’t matter how many point Nebraska scored against K-State, Callahan is a goner.

NC State is slowly and quietly becoming bowl eligible.

Notice how the Gamecock fans were gone by the middle of the 4th quarter? Yep the old USC is back. 🙂

The old Cal team is back is well.

For the last game played in the Orange Bowl, one would think Miami would at least put up a fight.

The offense of Clemson is playing as well anyone in the nation.

Kentucky denies Vandy a chance to be bowl eligible. By the way I got a lot of grief from Kentucky fans over this post. So even though the embarrassing lose to Gardner-Webb isn’t football related, all I can say is: Ha ha ha your team really sucks. 🙂

Service Academies 2 Notre Dame 0.

And finally Joel is writing an in-depth piece on Coach Croom. But all I have to say is this:

Others have been fired because of this.

So I profess on this day 11/11/07.



Posted in Alabama Crimson Tide, Auburn, Bama Sucks, big ten football, Big Twelve Football, Cal, Clemson Tigers, Croom, Fighting Illini, Florida State Seminoles, Fuck Bama, Georgia Bulldogs, Illinois Fighting Illini, K-State, kansas jayhawks, Kansas State Wildcats, Kentucky Wildcats, Lloyd Carr, mark richt, Maryland, Miami hurricanes, Michigan Wolverines, mississippi state bulldogs, Missouri Tigers, moral victories, NC State Wolfpack, Nebraska Cornhuskers, North Carolina Tarheels, Notre Dame Fighting Irish, notre dame sucks, ohio state buckeyes, Ron Zook, SEC Football, South Carolina Gamecocks, Texas A&M, Uconn, Uga, USC, Vanderbilt, vandy, Zooker | Tagged: , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , | 1 Comment »

All of a Sudden, EVERYONE Wants to Play Michigan.

Posted by Thomas the Terrible on September 11, 2007

You know it’s bad enough losing your first 2 of the season games at home, and one of the teams that beat you was 1-AA opponent, but to also lose your QB really hurts. You know you’ve hit rock bottom as a team when the coach of Norfolk State talks shit about you.

“How upside down has the world of college football become?

For the answer, look no further than Norfolk State coach Pete Adrian’s opening comment during a conference call with Rutgers beat writers yesterday.

“After watching Rutgers on film and watching Michigan play [Oregon], I think I’d rather be playing Michigan,” said Adrian, whose Football Championship Subdivision (formerly Division I-AA) team will be the Knights’ homecoming opponent Saturday.”

“We’re talking apples and oranges,” the coach said. “Appalachian State has won two national championships back-to-back. They’ve played Division I-A teams for the last 20 years, and this is our first endeavor playing Division I. We haven’t had a winning season in 10 years. There’s a lot of Division I teams that I don’t think would want to play Appalachian State with the team they’ve had.”

Rutgers players agree with Adrian that one game has nothing to do with the other.”

Ouch…that’s a kick to Old Blue’s nuts if you ask me, but I have to agree with him. I mean what team who hasn’t had a winning record in ten years wouldn’t love to play Meechigan right about now? I’m sure Duke would love to play them, and of course all the high school teams in this area would love it as well. My neighbor (pictured left) has a kid that plays Pop Warner, and he said just last Saturday, “Did you see Michigan’s pathetic defense? I could slice through that shit like melted ice cream. Now gimme some money!”, of course I did. I love the little man, I say man because at 11 years old, he carries a 9mm, can drink 2 40’s in under five minutes & has a diamond encrusted grill. People call him Baby Gangster the Pre-school Pimp. He’s already looking at going to either Florida, South Carolina, Miami or California. He said Southern Cal, wasn’t “thug” enough for his services.

So I profess on this day 9/11/07.


Posted in Cal, Florida Gators, Lloyd Carr, Miami hurricanes, Michigan Wolverines, Norfolk State, Pete Adrian, South Carolina Gamecocks, southern cal, Sports, University of California berkeley, University of Southern Cal, USC | 4 Comments »

Did Bo Schembechler Make a Pact With ummm SATAN?

Posted by Thomas the Terrible on September 10, 2007

Another outstanding submission from Joel. For the record I did not write this. I wish I did though. Leave comments and Joel will respond. Send me the hate mail and I will forward it to him. Now on with the terrifying story of Bo Schembechler and his deal with Saban…errr Satan…same thing actually….


The year, 1968. The place, Oxford, OH, Miami (OH) University. A young up and coming coach named Bo Schembechler is praying to coach big time college football, even if he has to coach against former coach and mentor Woody Hayes…

Bo (in his office studying game film): Damn it, we need to run that run play again in practice. 3 yards and a cloud of dust. Who needs hip movement and breakaway speed like those people at USC??? Damn John McKay. 3 yards a play, not 20 yards. Is it me, the crappy projector, this third highball of Canadian Club, or is it hot in here???

Appearing from the screen on the wall, burning a hole. Bo stumbles to the ground…

Satan: Arise, my young apprentice. I have a deal for you…

BS: Who the hell are you, and why do you smell like 1,000 little heaters. BTW, got any Lucky Stripes???

Satan: I am the Supreme Overlord Protector of the Underworld, the One responsible for man’s downfall in the Garden of Eden, the prince of the Earth, the Angel formerly known as Lucifer, I AM SATAN!!!

BS: What do you want with me??? Are you mad at me for that time I told the linemen that you haven’t seen hell until you deal with wintertime on this campus???
Satan: (laughs)…no son. I am actually here to talk. Man to…well…deity…

BS: Have some Canadian Club???

Satan: No, I just came back from visiting a young man named Steve Spurrier. He drinks some sort of Kool Aid that’s strong as hell. I couldn’t even finish a cup of it before he was begging for the last sips…

BS: He won the Heisman from that school in Florida. Didn’t know they had football there until he won it…

Satan: Oh yes, football is played elsewhere besides the Midwest. Ever heard of Bear Bryant???

BS: Yeah he won a few SWC titles at Texas A&M and won a couple of titles at Alabama. I always thought those titles were flukes because Big Ten football is real football.

Satan: Well what if I told you I had a lot to do with that, and with Steve Spurrier winning the Heisman, and with Richard Nixon getting elected…

BS: So why are you here???

Satan: Ahh my son, you like to cut to the chase. This is why I’m here: You really, deep down inside, want to coach at a major program right???

BS: Uh…yeah…

Satan: What if I told you that you could coach at a major program in the Big Ten???

BS: Woody ain’t dead yet so what major program are you speaking of???

Satan: Michigan is what I’m talking about retard!!!

BS: But I’m an Ohio guy.

Satan: Listen, do you really wanna stay here and coach here the rest of your life like the big guy upstairs wants you to???

BS: Would YOU wanna be stuck here coaching the rest of YOUR life???

Satan: That’s my point…you get to coach Michigan, in the Big Ten, against your “beloved” Woody. You’ll be a Michigan man. Your heart bleeds red, but your blood will flow blue. You’ll get Big Ten championships and have a winning record against your “beloved” Woody. You’ll win some bowl games but lose some too. Oh, no National Titles shall be yours while you coach. You will win one as an Athletic Director at Michigan in basketball and you’ll be a God in an entire fan base’s eyes. But, you shall pass on the eve of an Ohio State-Michigan game. The team will lose that game and go into a free fall. Michigan will lose relevance quickly, especially when they lose to a cupcake team.

BS: Sounds interesting…

Satan: Did I mention that one of your assistants will be coaching the team during this time of the downfall??? I will make him fall victim to being stuck in a time warp during play calling, missing out on stud recruits, and overall jackassedness…

BS: Jackassedness??? Is that even a word???

Satan: My point being, that I have someone else to take his place in a few years. He’ll have perfect hair, be coaching at Alabama, and be money hungry…

BS: Why can’t you give me the ability to win at least National Title???

Satan: Hey, the big guy upstairs will only let me do so much. I’m not a miracle worker like him. Besides, Big Ten championships are what count…right???

BS: Yeah, I want a Big Ten title.

Satan: I’ll give you 13…a satisfactory number right???

BS: 13??? Shit yeah. That’s satisfactory. Nice word placement…

Satan: Thanks. Damn Shakespeare. It’s his fault I use large words like that. I just couldn’t have the pussy British accent…

BS: So where do I sign???

Satan: Pull my finger…

Bo pulls finger. Fire comes out Satan’s ass. Both erupt in laughter…

Satan: Back to business…This is a legally binding document. Sign in blood…

BS (cutting finger using Swiss army knife): Here ya go…

Satan: I forgot your name is Glenn…It will be done. Oh, one other thing, you’re gonna have heart problems…

BS: Is that because I will now bleed blue??

Satan: No, I gotta fuck with you somehow. This way, it will remind you of our deal. Don’t worry, it could be worse. I gave Hitler a bunch of STD’s. Man was it funny looking at him scratch while trying to salute. That’s how he came up with the goose step. He was walking and scratching at the same time. It caught on. Well looks like you need to pack up and move to Ann Arbor. Success and mediocrity await Michigan fans…

Posted in Alabama Crimson Tide, BCS, big 10, big ten, Bo Schembechler, College Football, Dead Drunk, Lloyd Carr, Nick Saban, Ohio State, satire, Steve Spurrier, upsets | Leave a Comment »

The Revelations After a Saturdays Worth of Football Week 2

Posted by Thomas the Terrible on September 9, 2007

Here are my revelations from yesterday, as I suffered being a couch slave.

The Big East teams have no defense.

Virginia won Loser Bowl part 1, Notre Dame and Meechigan square off for Loser Bowl part deux next week.




If Marshall had something called depth, West Virginia would have lost.

Neither Georgia or South Carolina looked like they were playing to their full potential, they both looked sloppy.

The Big Eleven Ten sucks. Case in point Michigan, Ohio State should have rolled, Wisconsin was disappointing. Penn State didn’t look great.

I don’t believe Anthony Morelli is has good people seem to think he is.

From the comments Lloyd Carr made yesterday, I think he’s given up.

Mike Hart of Meechigan is stud running back who embodies what college athletics is all about.

It’s a toss up between “Cavemen” and “Carpoolers”, as to which show will be canceled first.

Bob Davie is the worst commentator ever.

LSU = Domination.

Auburn sucks

I don’t see how USC will go undefeated in PAC-10 this year. Sorry Gridiron Goddess.

Tennessee took a step in the right direction.

Freddy Brown of South Carolina took a cheap shot and clipped a Georgia player, there were three personal fouls commented by So. Carolina, like I’ve been preaching, lack of discipline off the field, shows on the field.

Mark Richt looked pissed after the game last night.

Texas didn’t beat TCU, TCU beat themselves, and I’m not sold on Texas’s offense.

Oklahoma continues to shine.

Nebraska was clearly looking ahead to playing USC next week.

Someone show some love to Tyrone Willingham and the Washington Huskies.

I’m not sure if Oregon is scary good, or Michigan is scary bad.

With the exception of Georgia Tech, the ACC sucks and is college footballs worst conference.

Like I said last week America’s team Virginia Tech was overrated (clap clap clapclap ), I just didn’t realize by how much.

If I see another flipping “Olive Garden” commercial, I’ll never eat there again.

Speaking of the “Tragedy Bowl of 2007” featuring LSU & Virginia Tech, was tragically boring.

I’m willing to bet that West Virginia & Louisville falls in the polls due to no defense.

Teams that still have questions because they are still playing weak cupcakes or pathetic teams in general are:

Florida, West Virginia, Louisville, Rutgers, Alabama, UCLA, Texas A&M, Pittsburgh, Kentucky & Maryland.

Posted in ACC, Alabama Crimson Tide, Auburn, BCS, big 10, Big 12, Big East, big ten, Coach Rich Rodriguez, College Football, Conference USA, Crimson Tide, Discipline, Duke, Ed Orgeron, ESPN, Florida Gators, football, Gamecocks, Georgia Bulldogs, Georgia Tech, Georgia Tech Yellow Jackets, Hokies, Kentucky Wildcats, Les Miles, Lloyd Carr, Louisville, LSU Tigers, Michigan Wolverines, NC State Wolfpack, NCAA, Nick Saban, Notre Dame Fighting Irish, notre dame sucks, Ohio State, Oklahoma sooners, Ole Miss, ole miss rebels, Oregon Ducks, Pac 10, Penn State Nittany Lions, Rocky Top, satire, SEC, SEC Coaches, South Carolina Gamecocks, South Florida Bulls, southern miss, Tennessee Volunteers, Texas A&M, University of Southern Cal, USC, Virginia Tech, West Virginia, WVU | Leave a Comment »

Charlie Weis: We Suck Even With Clausen as the QB.

Posted by Thomas the Terrible on September 9, 2007

For the first time ever, both Notre Dame and Michigan are 0 & 2. As next weeks “Loser Bowl 2007” comes closer, one has to wonder, will anyone even bother watching? Today the “Golden Child” Jimmy “The Emu” Clausen, started his first game, only to lose.

“All the talk was about Notre Dame freshman quarterback Jimmy Clausen. Penn State’s defense and Derrick Williams took the spotlight.

The 14th-ranked Nittany Lions bottled up Clausen in his starting debut, Williams had a 78-yard punt return for a touchdown and Austin Scott ran for two second-half scores in a 31-10 win Saturday night over the Irish.

The much-ballyhooed Clausen finished 17-of-32 passing for 144 yards and an interception. Most of the freshman’s completions were on swing passes or screens as Notre Dame coach Charlie Weis went conservative until midway through the fourth quarter.

Weis is crazy not to redshirt Clausen and don’t let that score fool you. Seven of the mighty 10 points wasn’t due to the offense.

“Darrin Walls staked the Irish defense to a 7-0 lead, returning an interception 73 yards for a touchdown and quieting a raucous crowd dressed almost entirely in white.”

Even Joe Pa was making excuses for Clausen and Notre Dame offense.

“With a young quarterback, you don’t want him to be comfortable. He’s a talented kid,” Penn State coach Joe Paterno said about Clausen.

A raucous crowd appeared to lead to numerous communication problems for the Irish offense, who were whistled for several offsides and delay-of-game penalties.

“It’s tough for a freshman to be successful with this crowd,” Paterno said. “I thought our crowd was phenomenal.”

Notre Dame’s offensive line, which was battered for nine sacks in the season-opening loss to Georgia Tech, couldn’t contain the Nittany Lions most of the game.”

One thing I did notice about Clausen is he runs prances like his older brother Casey. For two games in a row the Irish offense has yet to score a touchdown. As I said in a previous posting, the problem with the Irish offense is the offensive line. I’m wondering if any Notre Dame officials are regretting the firing of Tyrone Willingham yet. Especially since his Washington Huskies ended Boise State’s 14 game winning streak today.

“No wacky formations. No trick plays. The darlings got dumped.

No. 22 Boise State had its 14-game winning streak, longest in major college football, ended as resurgent Washington shut out the Broncos in the second half of the Huskies’ 24-10 victory Saturday.

Redshirt freshman Jake Locker threw for one score and ran for another while overcoming two turnovers. Washington beat a ranked opponent for the first time since 2003.

“We expected a lot more cleverness. When we got down to it, it was just window dressing,” Washington safety Roy Lewis said.”

OK, the first line is gold, and look at Roy Lewis talking smack…nice. I have a feeling it will get a lot worse for Notre Dame before it gets better. If Meechigan defeats them next week, I’m sure the fans will be praying to Touchdown Jesus Inc. for fat boy Charlie’s head. If Notre Dame wins, then Lloyd Carr should be fired immediately, since this Notre Dame offense is anemic at best.

So I profess on this day 9/9/07.


Posted in big 10, big ten, Charlie Weis, College Football, jimmy clausen, Lloyd Carr, Michigan Wolverines, NCAA, Notre Dame, Notre Dame Fighting Irish, notre dame sucks, Penn State Nittany Lions, satire, Sports, upsets | 2 Comments »