Your Mother Slept With Wilt Chamberlain

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Archive for the ‘NWA’ Category

For The Thug Who Has Everything

Posted by Joel Jackson on January 29, 2008


Now this is a present. This game is basically a Monopoly, but instead of “Go To Jail”, you try to break out of jail and/or get parole. This is a description of the game from the official website:

Fight your way through 6 different exciting locations in hopes of being granted parole. Escape prison riots in The Yard, slip glass into a mob boss’ lasagna in the Cafeteria, steal painkillers from the nurse’s desk in the Infirmary, avoid being cornered by the Aryans in the Shower Room, fight off Latin Kings in Gang War, and try not to smoke your entire stash in The Hole.

The artistry of each handcrafted piece is matched with comparable humor & intelligence on every card. Stack your smokes, sharpen your shank, and get ready for an experience that only someone on the outside could appreciate.

Wow. What more can be said. Check out the game pieces. Who among us played Monopoly as a kid and thought “Wouldn’t it be cool if instead of a thimble I could use a Glock as my game piece???”

What’s the sports connection??? Well let’s see: The founder of the company and game is John Sebelius, son of Kansas Gov. Kathleen Sebelius. Kansas is where America’s “favorite” marijuana smuggling (and smoking), lawsuit avoiding, Valtrex popping, inaccurate throwing, dog killing QB Michael Vick is currently doing his time. But let’s think of the endless possibilities..

How about a “Playmakers” Edition featuring O.J., his white Bronco, memorabilia, copy of “If I Did It”, and a Naked Gun DVD for playing pieces???

Or a “Ballers” Edition, with Kobe attached to a blonde female hotel clerk, Roy Tarpley, transcripts of Tim Donaghy’s gambling probe, Jack Sikma’s perm, and WNBA TV Ratings???

Lastly, what about a “Juiced” version, with Jose Canseco, Barry Bonds, Marion Jones, a syringe, and a torn record book???

If they market this game right, it could be a gold mine. Of course, someone needs to mail some of these games to all SEC schools, so they can play as part of the “Super Secret Double Probation”…


Posted in Alabama, Alabama Crimson Tide, alcoholics, All SEC Teams Beware!!, Arkansas, Arkansas Razorbacks, armed robbery, ass chewing, Ass Whipping, Auburn, bad calls, bad drivers, bad newz kennels, Bammers, baseball, basketball, BCS, bongs, boo birds, boosters, cheaters, classless, College Basketball, College Football, conVick, court tv, crazy, Crazy Women, Crime & Punishment, Crimson Tide, DAvid Stern, Dawgs, Dead Drunk, Discipline, divorce court, dog fighting, drugs, DUI, dumbass, Ed Orgeron, ESPN, FBI, Feds, Fines, fired, Florida, Florida Gators, Florida State Seminoles, football, FSU, Fulmer, gambling, Gamecocks, Gator Gangsters, Gator mafia, Georgia, Georgia Bulldogs, Go Vols, God, Goodell, guilty, Herban, Herban Meyer, ho, hooker, Houston Nutt, Internet Rumors, Isiah Thomas, James Dolan, Johnnie Cochran, Judge Judy, killer, Kobe, legal troubles, Little Bitch, LSU Tigers, Major League Baseball, marcus vick, Marijuana, mary jane, Michael Vick, michael vick pleads guilty, mississippi state bulldogs, Mitchell Report, MLB, mobsters, moron, murderer, NBA, NCAA, New York Knicks, NFL, NFL Football, nickelback sucks, notre dame sucks, NRA, NWA, OJ, OJ Simpson, Ole Miss, ole miss rebels, oliver stone, ookie, Pabst Blue Ribbon, Pacman, Pacman Jones, Phillip Fulmer, pimps, pitbull, Po Po, Police, pot, Prison for Vick, refs, repo, Ricky Williams, riots, satire, Scams, scandal, SEC, SEC Coaches, SEC Football, secrets, Sports, Stephon Marbury, steroids, stupid, taser, taxes, team spirit, Tennessee, Tennessee Volunteers, The Juice, Touchdown Jesus, trader, trailer trash, ugly wives, upsets, Vick, Vick Plea, VIP Connection, vols, walk-on, West Virginia, West Virginia Mountaineers, whiners, white trash, whore, WVU, zeke | 1 Comment »

The Florida State Football Players Can Beat Anyone at Breaking the Law.

Posted by Thomas the Terrible on September 21, 2007

Long gone are the glory days on the field for Bobby Bowden and the Florida State Seminoles. FSU used to be a football powerhouse, for now those days are gone. They still recruit some of the best players, especially those that attempt to whip the ass of a Tallahassee police officer.

“Florida State suspended two football players Friday after they were arrested in a bar fight that resulted in felony charges against one of them.

Junior linebacker Geno Hayes and senior fullback Joe Surratt were arrested early Friday at a bar near the Florida State campus, police and school officials said. Police said Hayes had to be subdued with a Taser and Surratt struck a police officer.

Surratt, 21, was charged with a felony count of battery on an officer. Hayes, 20, faces three misdemeanor counts: assault on an officer, resisting arrest without violence and disorderly conduct, Tallahassee police spokesman David McCranie said.

Both players were released on bail Friday, officials said.”

There goes “the man” again using those Tasers. What happened to the good old days of just getting pistol whipped? Don’t they know electric shocks can hurt and leave little scarring, but a good old fashion pistol whipping, now that shows you were beat down like a man. Resisting arrest without violence, Hayes you pussy, where’s your fighting spirit? I realize your first name is Geno, but still show some gumption. I hope bet your buddy that actually struck the officer got the heroic version of an ass-whipping AKA pistol whipped.

“Officers were on duty outside Potbelly’s Bar looking for underage drinkers when they noticed a man later identified as Hayes screaming profanities and waving his arms, a police report said. When officers tried to talk to him, Hayes became aggressive, police said.

Hayes was pulled away by his friends, but he resisted when officers then tried to handcuff him, leading an officer to stun him with his Taser, police said.

Police said Surratt was standing nearby and officers felt he was interfering with the arrest. An officer pushed Surratt away, and he responded by striking the officer, police said.

Hayes is the team’s second-leading tackler with 19, and Surratt led Florida State with six rushing touchdowns last year but is sidelined with a broken leg.”

Fuck tha police
Comin straight from the underground
Young nigga got it bad cuz I’m brown
And not the other color so police think
They have the authority to kill a minority

Fuck that shit, cuz I ain’t tha one
For a punk muthafucka with a badge and a gun
To be beatin on, and throwin in jail
We could go toe to toe in the middle of a cell…

Oh sorry I was have a N.W.A flashback. First of all who in their right mind would go into a place named Potbelly’s Bar? If I was drug into a bar like that I would have agitated and aggressive like Hayes as well. This is clearly Surratt’s fault. Beside Hayes seems like a pussy.

Surratt has a broken leg and yet he still struck an officer. Jerrell Powe would laugh about that if he could read, because he’s not idiot, illiterate yes complete idiot no. There is a difference. Does Surratt know that when you have a broken leg don’t strike a cop because you’ll have to run away? Both of these players got bomared by Po Po. Of course if these two chose to play for God Spurrier, they would have been assigned super USC attorney Neal “Johnnie Cochran Jr.” Lourie, and of course they would have been suspended indefinitely, which at South Carolina is three days tops.

This is Surratt, he even looks dumber than Powe.

So I profess on this day 9/21/07.




Posted in ACC, Bobby Bowden, Florida State Seminoles, guilty, Jerrell Powe, legal troubles, mullets, Noles, NWA, Po Po, Police, PTI, Tallahassee, taser, trailer trash | 3 Comments »