Your Mother Slept With Wilt Chamberlain

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Posts Tagged ‘Adolph Rupp’

A Peek Inside of Billy Clyde’s World

Posted by Joel Jackson on November 17, 2008

Inside the Kentucky Wildcat Locker Room After Friday’s Loss To VMI

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Wow!!! You fucktards really did it now. I cannot believe it. You are not about to embarrass me again. Wait, too late. You guys are really a group of fine individuals. 2 years in a row. I go to Sew Fine Tailors on Euclid Avenue & tell them to hook me up with the finest suit they have, so ol’ Billy Clyde can look sharp as a tack on opening night, and this is how you sissy merries repay me??? Jeremy, bring me my special Gardner-Webb flask…

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(Billy Clyde takes a swig)

You 22 mother fuckers are making me the fucking laughingstock of college basketball. You hear that??? That is ol’ Billy Donovon laughing his ass off. He turned down this job because their wasn’t enough hair gel in this barren wasteland of a state to last a year. He’s got his own personal Soul Glo guy just to style his hair. But not ol’ Billy Clyde. I don’t need gallons of Royal Crown Pomade in my contract. All I need is some of that Kentucky bourbon and some hot poon. Glynn, show these boys the action I got lined up after I leave here. Where’s that fancy iPhone??? Pass it around the locker room and show these sorry ass losers what they almost ruined for Billy Clyde.

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This here is Becky. She is a Miller Lite girl. Now I don’t waste time on beer because it gets in the way. Now you boys might think ol’ Billy Clyde would be in hog heaven, with a hot piece of tail & massive quantities of beer. But that is why you boys are losers. You don’t think. See, ol’ Billy Clyde is warming up.

(Takes 3 more huge swigs out of G-W gas can flask)

Billy Clyde wants it all. That white suit wearing asshole in Louisville is laughing his ass off at ol’ Billy Clyde. I want it all. That piss ant is getting all the glory in this state. I want one of those fancy banners in the rooftops too, so I can use it as a blanket when I am bedding trim in my off time. Tracy, I need 3 tonight.

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Damn Tracy, times must be hard. The economy is in the tank but I get a 4, 7, and 5??? I thought this was Lexington, not Morgantown??? What about the douchebag guys in the background??? Oh well. Bring them too. First time for everything, like you dipshits losing to a 6 win team. See boys, this is how ol’ Billy Clyde is rolling tonight, since you just ruined my season. Thanks. Career high my ass. There’s a reason I left College Station. That cow town had 3 hot chicks, and all of them were horrible in bed. If you are ever driving through Texas & wanna find College Station, let ol’ Billy Clyde tell you how to find it. You will know you are getting close when you start seeing the sheep back ass up to the fences.

Well, you sorry sacks of shit are excused. I will deal with you tomorrow after I give this poon some of Big Billy Clyde. Towelboy, I am taking some towels home. Gonna need that flask too.

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Posted in A&E's Intervention, Adolph Rupp, Billy Clyde, Billy Donovan, Billy Gillispie, College Basketball, Condoms, Dead Drunk, Douche Bag, drunk, DUI, gardner webb, Kentucky Wildcats, NCAA, SEC, SEC Coaches, Sports, Texas A&M, whiners | Tagged: , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , | 2 Comments »

Apparently Adolph Rupp Wouldn’t have Liked Billy Gillespie

Posted by Thomas the Terrible on April 7, 2008

Sure Bruce Pearl had to share the SEC coach of the year award with Billy “I lost to Gardner Webb, Houston, UAB & San Diego while embarrassing the SEC” Gillespie, we all know that. However the Commonwealth Athletic Club of Kentucky likes Bruce Pearl more and who can blame them?

The Commonwealth Athletic Club of Kentucky named Bruce Pearl it’s coach of the year and presented him with the Adolph Rupp Cup. The Adolph Rupp Cup has been given since 2004, with previous winners including Phil Martelli, Bruce Weber, Roy Williams and Bo Ryan.

Club spokesman Gerry Calvert, a former player for Rupp at Kentucky, had this to say about Bruce Pearl:

“Anybody who knew Coach Rupp well would tell you that Pearl is the kind of coach he would have loved to compete against. He typifies the passion, drive and excellence for which Coach Rupp will always be remembered.”

A source close to the Athletic Club said the reason why Billy Gillespie wasn’t receiving a share of the award even though he share coach of the year honors with Pearl was because they feared Billy would get drunk and piss right in the cup.

UT athletic director Mike Hamilton said he was pleased to hear Pearl was honored.

“Bruce’s honor was well-deserved,” Hamilton said. “A lot of coaches did a good job this year, but for us to have what could be considered our best season ever, with 31 wins, a No. 1 ranking and our first SEC outright title in 41 years, it’s gratifying to see Bruce win the award.”

He then went on to say “suck it Kentucky!”

Posted in Adolph Rupp, Billy Gillispie, Bruce Pearl, Kentucky Wildcats, Tennessee Volunteers | Tagged: , , , , | Leave a Comment »