Your Mother Slept With Wilt Chamberlain

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Posts Tagged ‘Cry Baby’

Michael Phelps, three-way sex, chewing tobacco and you

Posted by Thomas the Terrible on May 12, 2009

Say what you will about the UK’s News Of The World but remember that they were the ones that first published the photo of Michael Phelps sucking on a long bong. Well they’re at it again with a shocking interview of a Baltimore “dancer” who claims to know Phelps better than most people. Since when did whores start talking to the media?  Society is going to hell in a hand basket. 

While some may say that this is sensational journalism she was interview while wearing a pink teddy so she has to be creditable. During the interview she “bares” all that she knows about Phelps. (Warning NSFW) Theresa White states she met Phelps at a club where she is employed as an exotic dancer and he invited her and some friends back to his house for drinks and online poker. She claims that eventually a three hour ménage a trios began. She never answered the question, “Who enjoyed the double penetration more?” 

According to Theresa, Phelps: 

  • Still is a dope head
  • Wants to be a professional poker player
  • Is an emotional mess and cries like a baby
  • Blows all his money on booze and doesn’t tip well
  • Is paranoid about cell phone cameras (Well duh!)
  • Big mommas boy
  • Chews tobacco on an consistent basis and keeps full spittoons around the house (And if anyone would be put off by the unprofessionalism of spitting, it’s her.) 

Regardless of all these less than endearing qualities, Theresa claims she wouldn’t mind remaining “friend with benefits” with Phelps. I’m sure this interview will help keep that dream alive. Who says this guy isn’t a good role model? This is exactly what I want my future son to be doing when he gets to be around Phelps’ age.


Posted in Crazy Women, Cry Baby, Michael Phelps, Sex, Strippers | Tagged: , , , , | Leave a Comment »

But did they force him to yell “Thank you sir, may I have another?”

Posted by Thomas the Terrible on April 14, 2009

For the most part high schools are clueless as to what they want in life other than getting laid. I was clueless and chances are you were clueless as well. So when a high school football player quits his team and decides to come back what should the punishment be? Would you have him write a 400 word paper on the reasons he left and why he wants to come back or make him explain to his former teammates why he wants to return while profusely apologizing and allow them to take a vote on the matter? In a worst case scenario allow him to return but make him responsible for collecting all the dirty jock-straps to be laundered. Personally if I was the coach I would choose all of the above.

One high school in Texas does things a little different. Instead of reasonable solutions to this problem they rather make the student drop his pants for a brutal paddling.

In order to return to his team, a Lincoln High School (Dallas) varsity football player had to endure being struck on buttocks and lower back 21 times with a canoe paddle by seven different coaches. The brilliance of this punishment was conceived by head football coach, Jerry Sands, who is now on paid administrative leave.

At least they abandoned their original idea of using a trolling motor, and thank god he didn’t try to quit the baseball team!

“Lincoln coach Tyson Garner, who witnessed the paddling, stated in an affidavit that Sands gave the student about four licks before the board cracked at the base. Garner said another coach mended the board with athletic tape and gave the student five quick licks that were milder than the first four, seemingly to try to conclude the punishment.

But Sands “proceeded to continue the licks,” according to Garner. After the paddling, some witnesses heard Sands say, “What happens in the room stays in this room,” according to the report.”

jasper2I have a bit of a problem with the use of the term “licks” when it comes to what these guys were doing to that guy’s ass.

I believe that Lincoln High School might be the only high school in Texas with a canoe team.

The principle of Lincoln High School, Earl Jones, at first saw nothing wrong with this punishment and only gave the coaching staff a verbal reprimand, however I’m sure he is changing his tune now that he was given a 20-day suspension and reassigned to another campus. Apparently the Dallas School District is taking its cues from the Catholic Church playbook.

In most other states, paddling the (assumed) bare buttocks of an under aged boy would bring a felony sex crime charge.

In Texas, not so much.

You never see this on Friday Night Lights.

Posted in Cry Baby, Dallas, Getting spanked, High school Football, Lincoln High School, Paddle | Tagged: , , , , , | Leave a Comment »

Broken Plays for 10/23/08

Posted by Thomas the Terrible on October 23, 2008

Broken plays is collection of crap that I didn’t have the time to write about but I wanted to write something and since I’m rather pressed for time this AM let’s get to it.

In case you didn’t know Jerry “Hair plugs” Jones says Adam Jones checked into a facility “in another part of the country” to deal with his alcohol issue. The treatment plan is overseen by the NFL.

I can see it now:

*PacMan stands up at his first meeting.*

“Hello. My name is Adam and I have a problem. I done been here 3 hours and none of you bitches has showed me where the bar is. And where da strippers at man???? Where da strippers??? Get Jerry on da’ phone. This resort he sent me too sucks man!!!”

Has anyone notice how Fox Sports Charissa Thompson has really let herself go? See the above photo for a clear example. I bet Freddie Prinze, Jr. is determined to make her prom queen.

Rich Brooks had some not so nice things to say about the Kentucky fans from his press conference after last Saturday’s game:

“After the last two years? No, I don’t (think fans should have left) but that’s their prerogative,” Brooks said. “I wasn’t very happy at that stage of the game either and I’m looking for everything I can on the sideline to get our players back into it mentally. That’s part of the cascading affect that can have a real negative attitude on your football team. When those things happen around you you have to be strong enough to not let them affect you.

“I find it interesting about the perception of Kentucky football. What’s the ‘Bluegrass Miracle’? Now, you would think the Arkansas game might be better termed the ‘Bluegrass Miracle’ on the positive side so our ‘Bluegrass Miracle’ is a negative thing with Kentucky football. I find that very interesting. I find it interesting that you get more phone calls after a loss on the call-in shows than you do after a win. You might call that negativity, you know, the old glass half full, glass have empty.”

Support your team, Kentuckians!

Jay Cutler has started a war of words with Philip Rivers by saying:

“I have a stronger arm than John, hands down. I’ll bet on it against anybody’s in the league. Brett Favre’s got a cannon. But on game days, there’s nobody in the league who’s going to throw it harder than I am at all.”

His cameo in a South Park episode has clearly gone to his head. Notice since he started talking, his numbers have gone down. SHUT THE FUCK UP!!!

The Browns have suspended Kellen “I’m a MF’ing Soldier” Winslow for “unwarranted, inappropriate, and unnecessarily disparaging” remarks about the organization, as they put it.

What at first was reported as an undisclosed illness, which was then soon rumored to be “swollen testicles,” medically known as hydrocele. The truth turned out to be that Winslow was suffering from a staph infection.

“Regardless of how this was released the information would still remain the same,” Winslow said. “I contracted staph, again. I spoke out on this because I felt it was the right thing to do and that is why I was so passionate about it. This has nothing to do with football and this has nothing to with my current contract situation. This is a health concern.

“I care deeply for my organization, my teammates, and the Browns fans. At no time was I ever trying to cause distress for the team or be a distraction but the fact remains there is a health issue that needs to be addressed further.”

You’d think he’d be used to being treated like a piece of meat after sharing a locker room with Brady Quinn for two years.

Just to let everyone know, all the troubles Vince Young is having is apparently the fault of the media.

“I feel like they’re writing my legacy,” Young said. “They’re writing my story. I’m a great guy, a great humble guy. I’ve done a whole lot in my career in just three years and for [the media] to do stuff like that to try to make me look bad for some reason – I don’t know why – but they’re just writing my legacy.”

I know who I am, everyone knows who I am as a person. They know good and well, I ain’t trying to commit suicide or all that kind of crap. It was just a story everybody wanted to write. It was hot and everybody need to make their money, feed their viewers. I always get the bad end but I just brush that off and use that as motivation for myself.”

You know someone is humble when they point out how humble they are. I bet Jerry Jones approves of this response.

Young then trailed off for a moment, before yelling…”I drive a Dodge Stratus!!”

What a shocker A-Rod and Ho-Rod Madonna are romantically involved.

This will throw the scent off the gay trail! Because nothing says “Not gay!” like an insatiable Madonna obsession.

+1 to A-Rod’s PR people.

Apparently New Berlin Eisenhower High School football program has given R. Kelly a new idea for a new song. Thinking the restrooms were locked during halftime at a recent game against (I swear I not making this name up) Pewaukee High, the visiting Eisenhower players relieved themselves on the outskirts of the playing field.

Superintendent Paul Kreutzer tells the Journal Sentinel he has spoken with the players and says they showed incredibly poor judgment during halftime of Monday night’s game. Parents of opposing players agree. “I was very mad and I thought it was completely rude and uncalled for,” said Michele Bellows, whose son plays for Pewaukee’s junior varsity team. “I thought that they were making a statement like ‘the heck with you guys.’ ” Pewaukee Athletic Director John Maltsch admonished the boys and their coach over the public address system, saying “Coach, we do have facilities for your players to use.”

Ooooh. Urine some trouble now boys. According to the Flomax commercial, not only did these kids disgrace themselves, they are going to miss a photo op with their buddies.

I have just one pressing question. WTF is TO wearing? He looks like big old pass dropping bumblebee. Normally, T.O.’s barbershop quartet, The Pill Poppin’ Pen Pullin’ Prim Donnas, elect not to wear the yellow sweater.

Posted in A-Fraud, Alex Rodriguez, cleveland browns, Cry Baby, Dallas Cowboys, Denver Broncos, Jerry Jones, Kentucky Wildcats, Madonna, Pacman Jones, Rich Brooks, T.O., Tennessee Titans, Terrell Owens, Vince Young | Tagged: , , , , , , , , , , , , , , | 1 Comment »

The Clemson Crying Game

Posted by Thomas the Terrible on October 15, 2008


This is my favorite Bowden face of anguish

The majority of Clemson fans that I know, which happens to be a lot, aren’t in the least bit sad about Tommy Bowden’s departure. However Dave of Mount Pleasant, who called in to the Live 5 News sports report is taking it rather hard.

Dave tries to put on his “big boy” brave face but by the end of the call the sobbing takes over & the realization that Tommy is gone shatters the facade he tried so hard to keep up.

You might have to turn the volume up for this one folks. Notice the two sports casters as they truly try their best not to laugh on the air.

Shout outs go to Ben, Angela, Cleveland & Amanda because I know no tears were shed on your part.

Posted in ACC Football, Clemson Tigers, Cry Baby, Tommy Bowden | Tagged: , , , | 1 Comment »

I’m not done with Wednesday’s update yet quite yet….

Posted by Thomas the Terrible on October 1, 2008

This has been an extremely busy week for stories involving NFL players that aren’t necessarily related to the heroism players show each and every Sunday. In fact most of them are very un-hero like. There’s so many that I don’t possibly have the time to write about them all.

So instead of writing boring stories with humorous & snarky quips, I’m just going to write a few lines and link them. After all that’s better nothing right? Yeah…that’s what I thought.

As we know former Tennessee God and Denver running back Travis “I gots 9 Mf’ing 9 kids” Henry’s baby mommas gots to get paid! Now since he is technically unemployed he decided to the next best thing and that is set up a drug deal involving cocaine.

Problem is he was busted. His new teammates Malice and Pusha T are disapointed and are dropping him from the Re Up Gang. Hey Henry remember don’t get Mile High on your own supply.

Terrell Owens still ♥’s his QB but hates “Sheshawn” Johnson.

“Then, Owens turned his attention to Johnson, who he referred to as “Sheshawn” on three separate occasions, the Star-Telegram reported.

(As the No. 1 overall pick in the 1996 draft) he is the ultimate underachiever on that (ESPN) panel. I am the reason he is in the booth,” Owens said. “Everybody is aware when I was brought to Dallas, he was the one they let go to get me here.”

And Sheshawn’s in the booth to replace Michael Irvin. ‘Cause Michael’s a crack head.

When Terrell ever gets fed up with Romo, ooh, what a nickname he has in store. Here’s a hint:

Remember when Steve Smith whipped Ken Lucas’s ass? Well now they are BFF’s forever!

“Smith scored his first touchdown of the season on a 54-yard pass from Jake Delhomme late in the second quarter, then presented the ball to Lucas on the sideline.”

Apparently Plaxico Burress has some issues with being tardy and is paying the price with fines. Sarah Palin’s daughter had that ‘late’ problem too, but mom wouldn’t let her throw money at her problem to take care of it. (Oh no I didn’t)

Eli Manning should hook Plaxico up with one of his Citizen watches.

Some people took the Georgia loss real hard over the weekend. Danny Ware a former Georgia player and current New York Giants running back took it extremely hard by getting drunk and arrested.

Ware and a 24-year-old Dallas woman attracted a police officer’s attention at about 2:25 a.m. Sunday at East Clayton Street near North Jackson Street because they seemed oblivious to traffic that had to steer around them as they stood in the street talking, according to police.

Ware admitted that he’d been drinking, and a breath test showed he had a blood-alcohol content of 0.152 grams, police said.

Lovely he wasn’t even driving he was just trying to get a hook up for later. I wonder if he feels worse about Georgia losing or the fact he’s a drunken pedestrian that was busted while wearing temporary Bulldog tattoos stuck to his face (“cheek flair”) which adds another level of humiliation.

This one is a little old however I meant to write about it. Apparently even though Pacman Jones broke the law several times, players on the Titians still respected him more than they respect Vince Young…you know the “leader” of the team.

“Vince definitely is going to have to win the locker room back. As bad as Pacman was when he left the building or at 3 o’clock in the morning, it never interfered with his football. He loved football. Loved practice. The guys loved him. Players are going to be on your side if you show that you’re going to help them win. Vince has to prove that to this team.”

Further proof that football players care mostly about whether their teammates are helping them win, something Young was not doing.

Not only does he have to worry if Terrell Owens will finally blow his lid but Jerry Jones must pay $25,000 to NFL for flapping his mouth about Ed Hochuli. Terrell Owens just laughs and laughs.

I’ll show love to baseball as well.

Even though he no longer coaches the Dodgers some people in San Francisco harbor ill feelings towards Tommy Lasorda by getting all pissy because he’s the grand marshal in the Italian American parade.

Supervisor Michela Alioto-Pier wants organizers of the San Francisco Italian American parade to boot Tommy Lasorda as grand marshal … He’s the former manager of the Los Angeles Dodgers, who’ve had “an intense rivalry” with our hometown Giants for years and “nobody embodies that more than Tommy Lasorda,” states the resolution … The Giants aren’t doing so great, it continues, and “Dodger fans are boastful and smug.”

For someone in San Francisco to call another person smug is rather hypocritical. Of course maybe they would prefer Joe Torre instead.

Everyone knows Eddie Vedder recorded a song for the Chicago Cubs right? Not to be left out the Tampa Bay Devil Rays have to have a song as well. However the best they could muster was Kevin Costner and his band “Modern West” penning them a diddy titled “It’s All Up To You.”

The song can be heard here, but be forewarned that one listen may cause cerebral hemorrhaging, blindness & the sudden love of shitty music.

Just in case you want to sing along, though:

“You got to swing for the fence, give a hundred percent,

“Dust yourself off, get up and do it again.

“You’re the only one that can make your dreams come true.

“You’re the only one, it’s all up to you.”

Posted in cocaine, Cry Baby, Dallas Cowboys, Danny Ware, Dawgs, Denver Broncos, drugs, drunk, Georgia Bulldogs, Jerry Jones, Major League Baseball, New York Giants, NFL Football, Pacman Jones, Tennessee Titans, Tennessee Volunteers, Terrell Owens, Tommy Lasorda, Tony Romo, Vince Young | Tagged: , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , | Leave a Comment »

The Al Davis press conference shows what Death looks like. Now, when my time comes, I’ll know.

Posted by Thomas the Terrible on October 1, 2008

I am the evil Emperor from Star Wars!

Did anyone see the rather revealing press conference that was held by the living corpse Al Davis regarding the firing of Kiffin? If not you missed the NFL’s most Jerry Springer moment to date. This was must see TV. It was better than the Presidential Debate.

Al Davis stated that Kiffin was fired for “propaganda” and “lying” that had gone on supposedly for months.  Kiffin was “bringing disgrace to the organization,” Davis said, calling Kiffin on multiple times a “flat-out liar.”

One thing is clear to me: Al Davis looks like a more-evil version of Freddy Krueger.

Davis revealed a letter that he wrote to Kiffin before the Kansas City game outlining in detail the coach’s faults. Davis further stated that Kiffin leaked a copy of the letter to the press.

At this point Davis rambled on about Mortensen of ESPN for breaking the story and accuses Kiffin of leaking the letter to the ESPN reporter because “that’s the way he wanted to handle it.” (Great question to the local reporters assembled: “Why didn’t any of you guys have it?”)

Perhaps my all-time favorite Al quote:

“Mortensen lies…he’s a professional liar.”

Davis placed the letter on an overhead projector for the press to read. For the record I once tortured a college professor by turning his overhead projector against him.

He basically calls Kiffin a douche bag for blaming the team’s performance on the ownership of the Raiders & defensive coordinator Rob Ryan. Davis also said that Kiffin called every play on offense during his time with the team, and that he split the play-calling duties with an unnamed assistant coach on Sunday against the Chargers.

Davis said that Kiffin didn’t want to draft quarterback JaMarcus Russell, because Kiffin thought he’d be the “overweight guy” and the “uninterested guy.”  Davis also claims that Kiffin wanted the Arkansas job and was “upset as hell” that Bobby Petrino got the job.

How do you accuse someone of propaganda and then go and state your case why he deserves to be fired and not let him refute the charges? Isn’t this just Raiders propaganda.

I don’t know about the rest of the world but I would imagine that 90% of NFL fans, Raider fans included, are on Lane’s side on this one. While Davis was a huge figure in the formation of the league its doing stuff like this that has ruined his team and his reputation.

I think Davis did his best George Costanza and doing the opposite of everything that is rational.

Honestly, after seeing this press conference, I can not think of a worse scenario for Cable to enter.

Posted in Al Davis, Cry Baby, ESPN, Kiffin, NFL Football, Oakland Raiders | Tagged: , , , , , | 3 Comments »

Jose Canseco Will Most Likely be on Judge Judy

Posted by Thomas the Terrible on June 12, 2008

Jose “Snitch Bitch” Canseco is not having a good year. His latest book is a flop. He lost his 7300-square foot home to foreclosure last month. Now his former attorney has filed a lawsuit against the retired baseball star for not paying him.

Attorney Robert Saunooke said the former slugger and current bum didn’t pay him for five years of work. He said Canseco owes him between $350,000 and $500,000 for representing him in civil and criminal matters, contract negotiations, plane trips and book deals. All this will make for riveting television for the likes of Judge Judy.

Canseco said he’s confident that he will win any challenge if it goes to court. He said his former attorney is only one of many people who have attacked him since he began revealing his use of steroids — and alleging that of other players — in baseball several years ago.

“I’m surrounded by liars and thieves,” says the man who allowed his home to be foreclosed on.

Canseco’s current attorney, Gregory Emerson, did not immediately return messages left at his office or his cell phone. He was probably trying to track Jose down to get that all important retainer that Canseco seems to keep “forgetting” to pay.

Saunooke said Canseco never paid the money he earned during the time that the 2005 book titled, “Juiced: Wild Times, Rampant ’Roids, Smash Hits & How Baseball Got Big” was published, and when he demanded Canseco pay, the former major leaguer hired Emerson.

“I had thought he was a friend. That’s why I stayed with him as long as I did,” Saunooke said. “When you represent famous people, it’s not easy to run away from them. I’m not the kind of lawyer that would desert my client.”

Saunooke said he accompanied Canseco to Washington in 2005 for a congressional hearing on steroid use in Major League Baseball, among other legal issues while he has been his attorney.

“He doesn’t have any money problems,” Saunooke said. “He just doesn’t pay his bills.”

Jose is clearly a bum however Saunooke should know as an attorney and more importantly as a person, when you lay with dogs you’re bound to get dog shit on you.

Posted in court tv, Cry Baby, Jose Canseco, Judge Judy, Juiced, Snitches, steroids | Tagged: , , , , , , | 1 Comment »

Is Delle Donne Done at UConn?

Posted by Thomas the Terrible on June 11, 2008

Incoming UConn freshman Elena Delle Donne left campus last week during her first week of summer school and headed to her Wilmington, Del., home.

It is all Pat Summitt’s fault, I’m not sure how it is, but it is.

UConn women’s basketball coach Geno “Horse Face” Auriemma confirmed Delle Donne’s departure Saturday in an e-mail to The Hartford Courant.

“This is nothing out of the ordinary,” Auriemma told the newspaper. “It happens all the time.”

Delle Donne, a 6-foot-5 swingman and the national high school player of the year, chose UConn over Tennessee and Villanova without a tour of ESPN.

A source close to the Pennsylvania AAU basketball scene, where Delle Donne played during her high school career, told the Hartford Courant that the community had heard Delle Donne was upset about something that occurred during an informal scrimmage with teammates on campus.

However I believe she skidded into the popcorn stand after Gino raked his hair gel during an informal practice.

He told her that was one of the hazards of being coached by a primping prima-donna ego-manic.

UConn can only hope that’s how the situation is resolved. Ernie Delle Donne told The Courant late Saturday that he had no idea how long it will take for his daughter to sort through the issues that forced her to leave summer school.

Delle Donne told Auriemma on Saturday that she didn’t know how long it would take or whether a return to UConn for the second summer session — or ever — was an option.

Maybe she realized she made a mistake and she didn’t want to play for a cheater…or a disrespectful smartass.

Posted in Big East, Cry Baby, ESPN, Geno Auriemma, Uconn | Tagged: , , , , | 2 Comments »

Is Jeremy Shockey a Dick or just a Bitch?

Posted by Thomas the Terrible on June 9, 2008

Jeremy Shockey is threatening not to show up for the New York Giants’ mini-camp this week due to the fact he’s acting like a complete dick or maybe a little bitch. I haven’t decided on which one yet.

“Who knows? I might go to see my mother in Texas. I have no idea,” Shockey said.

Shockey, in New York for a promotional event, shared his crybaby gripes with reporters.

“Unlike the Giants, I’m going to be quiet,” he said. “They’ve released multiple things about myself and if you look back into the media, there’s always a source. Well, I’d like to know who this source is and we’ll go over here and we’ll deal with it ourselves, because I haven’t said one negative thing toward the Giants in the newspapers.”

Shockey was making his first public comments since breaking his leg in December. The Giants went on to beat the Patriots to win the Super Bowl. Afterward, Shockey was a no-show for the team’s victory parade in New York, its visit to the White House and its championship ring ceremony.

So let’s get this straight: he gets injured, misses the rest of the season, Giants go and win the Super Bowl anyway, he skips all of the celebrations, and then might not come to mandatory mini camp. If I were in his position I’d be more concerned about just making the team than anything that has been said about me.

In the weeks leading up to the draft, the New Orleans Saints and several other teams approached the Giants about a trade for the oft-injured Pro Bowler. The Giants listened, but that was it.

Shockey has told friends that he is unhappy with his role, his contract and the notion that the Giants were better without him after he broke his leg in Week 15 because Eli Manning didn’t have the burden of having to pass the ball to Shockey to keep him happy.

How does breaking a leg and missing the playoff run entitle Shockey to a raise one year into a 5 year deal? This guy will never be happy; dumping him would be addition by subtraction.

If he does attend the mini-camp, Shockey said he’ll be limited.

“Obviously. I’m not 100 percent and if I do show to minicamp, it’s going to be, I wouldn’t imagine me doing much, just getting treatment on my leg,” Shockey told reporters.

When he was healthy he ran incorrect routes, dropped numerous passes and pulled childish antics on the sideline. Whined that he wasn’t being used properly and the Giants had a not so terrific offense. He breaks his leg and the next thing we see is the Giants going into Dallas and winning, going to Green Bay and winning, and down to Arizona and laughing at the rest of the NFL. Shockey isn’t the invaluable commodity he thinks he is. The team has won without him. So give him a crying towel and send him somewhere else.

I thought only the receivers were Divas. Shockey was supposed to be a tough guy. The Giants fans are disappointed in him. He should be happy to honor his contract. No one from the Giants was bad mouthing him. His feeling seem hurt because they won a title without him. Grow up.

Posted in Cry Baby, dumbass, Jeremy Shockey, New York Giants, NFL Football | Tagged: , , , , | 2 Comments »

One Week Later & Danica is Still Acting Like a Bitch

Posted by Thomas the Terrible on June 2, 2008

A week after Danica Patrick showed that her testosterone level is above normal…even for Barry Bonds, she refuses to apologize to Ryan Briscoe or anyone else.

“You know, adrenaline’s pumping,” she said of the post-race blowups. “That usually lasts after every weekend, after every time you’re on the track in race situation, for an hour or two after. Your adrenaline’s up. You’re thinking about it, talking, sort of debriefing the whole thing. That’s the same pretty much every weekend.”

–“You know, adrenaline’s pumping,” she said of the post-race blowups. “That usually lasts after every weekend…”

…or at least every fourth weekend or so.

“I don’t regret my instincts and emotions, nor can I change them very easily,” she said Friday. “I try to not live with those kinds of regrets. I think everything happens for a reason.”

Male or female, it doesn’t matter. She threw a fit in a race she was not going to win, and when she did she came across as a phony to me. I’ve read about Tony Stewart and Kyle Busch act the same way this year, but at least they did so when they were knocked out of races they should have won. When these guys get knocked out when they have no chance, they do not throw as much of a fit as Danica did in Indy.

Patrick and Briscoe talked briefly hours after the 500 and Briscoe said Thursday that neither of them apologized or took blame for the incident.

“I think the one thing we’ve agreed on is, we both want to just move on,” Briscoe told The Associated Press. “And I’m happy we’ve got a race this weekend so we can put that behind us.”

“You always have to walk that fine line in racing with being respected for being a tough competitor, but fair.”

Patrick agreed, saying, “As a race car driver, I don’t know if any of us have that hard a time. … We go on to the next event. All we’re concerned about is performing at that next event … and thinking about the car and the track.

“I mean, for myself, I forget the weekend before pretty quickly. It’s not that difficult. It’s just kind of my nature. … I think a lot of us drivers are probably the same.”

“For the most part, almost every weekend it does happen,” she said. “You know, there’s usually somebody that you walk away from the track not liking that weekend for some particular reason. So that’s pretty common

“Being a short track like this, putting all these cars on one track, it’s definitely possible that people are going to be fighting for the same road. But I think that it’s good here that we can two-wide, as well.”

Patrick added, “That’s just racing. If we were all polite to each other every second, it wouldn’t be racing. We have to race hard. … You can’t be too aggressive that people don’t respect you because you’re driving like an idiot. And then there’s the other side of it, being too passive and people just think of you as weaker on the track because of that.

Ashley Judd vs Danica Patrick? Pay per view bonanza!

For some reason people think shes the best thing since sliced bread…. shes won “1” race…. thats all.

But that doesn’t change the fact that she is a diva, full of herself and hyped well beyond her ability. she should spend less time on magazine covers and more time behind the wheel before she decides to become the circuit enforcer. As for being knocked of the big race, the only way she was going to win that day was if everybody else ahead of her dropped out or her constant whining made everybody’s heads explode. She spent 90 minutes complaining on her crew radio about not being able to keep up then claims she had her chance taken away. She does excel at magazine covers.

Asked what he would do if Patrick came looking for him after a race, Dixon grinned and replied, “I’ll be running, man, I’ll be running. I think if you get involved in that, it can only be bad.”

He wasn’t about to place blame for the Indianapolis collision, either.

“I think it was a total racing incident,” Dixon said. “It’s a narrow pit. I think the only thing that Briscoe maybe did wrong, which all of us do, is spin the wheels too much, got into the side of her. I’ve been involved in so many of those accidents on pit road, you can’t do anything about it. That’s just one of those things.”

My take? She got mad, she vented, nothing happened. The hell is there to apologize over? She cuts the guys break lines this weekend, then she might have to say sorry.

Danica is like a Ferrari: Beautiful with classic lines, geared to be a winner, and have mercy on any goof ball who gets in her way on the way to the finish line.

She had no chance at all to win the race, as usual. I don’t care if she finishes consistently in the top 10. If you’re not first, you’re last, period.

She is nothing but an over-hyped average driver who acts like a prima donna. She is the Terrel Owens of

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